Time for a little street justice

“NIce leather jacket! Where’d you get it?”

“Oh, I picked it up from Wings pub when some sucker had his back turned. Picked up a nice laptop bag, too, but the jerk didn’t even have a laptop in it. If I see that cheap bastard again, I’m gonna spit on him.”

“No kidding.”


Thus ends my revenge fantasy, with me kicking the thief’s butt, with the assistance of the 1960s-era Batman and Robin.

My stuff got stolen tonight when my back was turned. Property crime isn’t anything new in this city and by most standards, my own case is fairly mild.

But I’m still upset. I’m the victim of a crime – and not for the first time in this city. I got attacked by thugs a couple of years back while heading home at night from UBC. Fortunately I was able to defend myself well enough to escape with my brains still safely tucked inside my cranium.

Crime is part of life in the big city. I know that, rationally. But I’m angry – not so much about losing a reliable bag or a nice jacket that was a gift from my wife, but mostly because I know there’s pretty much zero chance of the perpetrators ever getting caught. And even if they were busted, they’d just get sent through our revolving-door justice system and be back on the street in less than an hour.

NOTE TO THE THIEF OF MY STUFF: I recently got a cut on my hand that became infected, for which I have to take antibiotics. I hope you get the flesh-eating disease from my jacket sleeve. Cheers.

4 Comments so far

  1. Jeffery Simpson (unregistered) on June 16th, 2007 @ 8:07 am

    I don’t get it, you were on a submarine?

    That sucks, getting stuff taken always is terrible. I remember getting my Wayne Gretzky poster stolen from me in grade school, and it still burns me up.

  2. Carol Browne (unregistered) on June 17th, 2007 @ 1:00 pm

    Blech. That’s an awful feeling. I remember when my place was broken into. I had a great big camping backpack and they just filled it up with all my stuff and left. That instant you realize your stuff is gone is so crummy. I also had my leather jacket stolen in that break-in and for a few years after I looked at every single black jacket and checked to see if it was mine.

  3. David D. (unregistered) on June 18th, 2007 @ 9:36 pm

    Hi Jonathon,
    Man, I don’t know if this is going to show up in the crime statistics, but I also got hit couple of weeks ago. (blogged about it as well; the bastard got my wallet). The stench of violation has worn off, but I still have that niggling feeling in the back of my mind that even after I canceled all of the cards, notified people and banks, etc. I’m going to get some sort of glitch of id theft or something like that months or years from now. Glad that at least you don’t have that hanging over you.

  4. Jonathon Narvey (unregistered) on June 18th, 2007 @ 10:02 pm

    Thanks for your sympathies, David. I sincerely hope you don’t have any further trouble on account of that thief. ID theft is an absolutely horrific consequence of our wired world. I suppose the best case scenario one could reasonably hope for would be if your thief subsequently ended up getting capped by a dealer angry over late payment and your wallet inadvertently fell down a gutter, swept in by the torrent of blood from the plugged thug…

    Hmmmmm. Maybe I AM still bitter over my experience.

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