I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t think the Canucks have been making very good decisions lately. The off-season has had the sort of amateur blunders that make Newcastle United look like a properly organized football team. But that’s enough mixing sports, we’re here to talk about hockey and the Vancouver Canucks and how they’ve just gone an appointed goaltender Roberto Luongo as their captain.

Now of course there’s a rule against a goaltender being a captain in the NHL [wp] that’s based on that fact that since the primary on-ice role of the captain is to act as a liaison between the team and the officials during the game, and that it would be too time consuming for a goalie to rush out of his net to argue with the referee every time he wanted to argue said ref’s decision. So Luongo won’t technically be the captain, he won’t wear the ‘C’ or take part in any official face-offs say if the Queen were to stop by to drop the puck.

At least unless the team has gone far more loopy than we all thought.

Unless they’re all on wacky pills at GM Place, and really it’s too early in the reason to call that one, the Canucks simply recognized as a team leader. He’ll be in charge of being the team’s dressing room leader, be responsible to organizing team social events and act as the representative between the team and the community.

So he’ll be doing fun runs and posing for pictures with babies.

He’ll also be the first one handed the Stanley Cup when his team wins it. That team won’t be the Canucks of course, but who knows where he’ll end up after this.

Vancouver has of course a lot of experience with an un-official Captain, since let’s face it the team never did the right thing to honour Trevor Linden with the ‘C’ after his return despite the fact that from most accounts he was the on and off ice leader during the end of last season.

But enough about the past. It’s time to be optimistic, and because of this decision I’m in a mood to upgrade my season prediction from missing the playoffs to almost making the playoffs. Now that’s what you call leadership.

Update: The CBC say everything I do with half the words and a third the venom [cbc].

Let’s face it this year has the potential to be a horrible hockey year for Vancouver. Pick up tickets to the WHL Giants because the Canucks have all the markings of a disaster about them as the year is about to begin. Making the playoffs will be unlikely in a competitive Western Conference where every team has strengthened while the Canucks have been throwing talent overboard as if hoping to right a sinking ship. The off-season has been a farce and there’s nothing to suggest that’s about to change.

How bad is it? You’ll find out after the jump.

An off-season to forget

Appointing a rookie General Manager sounds kind of dumb for a team that’s meant to be a Stanley Cup contender, but that sort of limited ambition is what Vancouver fans should have come to expect. Nobody is aiming to win, they’re just aiming not to come in last. The appointment of Mike Gillis made a little more sense when you consider that he was the Canucks star player Marcus Naslund’s agent prior to that. Obviously keeping Canucks captain Naslund was important, especially given the retirement of the team’s other leader Trevor Linden had retired. Too bad then that they didn’t even offer him a new contract.

Instead of resigning Naslund Gillis made a big deal about how the Canucks were about to sign Mats Sundin, allowing Naslund to sign for the New York Rangers. Of course talking with Sundin before talking with the press about how he was about to arrive in Vancouver might have been a good idea, because Sundin seemed surprised to learn that he had already signed with Vancouver. Sundin isn’t coming, and even if he was it’s not 1997 so I’m not sure why we wanted him.

It’s also not 2002, and so the arrival of Pavol Demitra isn’t exactly reassuring.

The Good News

I don’t want you to think it’s all bad. Okay it’s mostly bad, but even the darkest clouds have silver somewhere hidden in them. I mean if you’re going to trust cliches they do. As long as the team gives 110% every game and sticks to playing the fundamentals.

Wait… sorry I was channeling The Province.

Basically the good news is that Roberto Luongo is still a Canuck. 2007’s Hart Trophy (League MVP) runner up belongs at a better team. The Canucks will win games they’ve got no business winning because he’s in the net, and if someone could build a time machine and shoot him back in time to any of the number of years when we had Dan Cloutier in net for the playoffs the Canucks would have a few Stanley Cup banners hanging from the rafters.

The trouble was he was not enough to drag the team into the playoffs last year, and with an overall weaker team he probably won’t be able to do it this year either. Luongo’s a motivated player, and last year when it was clear that none of the team could be arsed to even try, save for Luongo and Linden, there were definite questions as to whether he would stay in Vancouver.

The overall

Being complete shit has become too comfortable to the Canucks, and as an organization they don’t look like they’re willing to change things. Instead of bringing in a top level manager to sort things out they brought in a novice and then let Steve Tambelini go to Edmonton to be the General Manager there. No matter how bad the team plays they will sell out every game, sell jerseys and baseball caps. It’s Vancouver, it’s Canada and the fact is we’re happy to accept performances that would never get a pass in cities like Toronto, Edmonton and Montreal.

In an American city where hockey plays third fiddle to football and baseball and the team owners can’t count on the team selling out every home game, being so complacent would mean the death of a franchise. The Canucks will survive, but it’s going to be a long season.

The CBC [cbc] informed me that the city was celebrating the completion of the Canada Line tunnel today, bringing the most patriotic Skytrain line that much closer to completion.  Here’s five more things that we’re celebrating today.  Please insert sarcastic quotes where appropriate.

5)The Canucks loss to the Blackhawks [cbc]: Face it we’re not a city that’s comfortable with a winning NHL team, and so these overtime losses are making us feel safe.  When the team’s winning we start getting into debates with each other on the Skytrain and in line at the movies about ontology.  Now we no longer have to worry about Anselm and his arguments.

4)The Olympics are coming: Why did we have a two year pre-Olympic celebration and not a two year minus one month pre-Olympic celebration?  Is it just me or do the rest of you feel your very neutrons vibrating with eager anticipation?  If I get much more excited I might dissipate.

3)More Pickton [vs]: I have to pick the first season up on DVD before watching next year’s.

2) Conrad Black is going to jail [gs]: Happy days.  No sarcastic quotation marks needed here.

1) The Canucks again [exn]: They might not be able to beat an NHL team, but boy they can wipe the floor with the Hives.