Joining the Orcas and Spirit Bears

Just after we’ve gotten rid of the Spirit Bears, Vancouverites can now look forward to being inundated with bald eagles.

The majestic winged creatures will soar into the cities of the Lower Mainland in 2009 and will be on hand to greet the international masses at the Olympics. Once again, Judson Beaumont, creator of the Orcas and Spirit Bears, has designed the seven-foot birds with wings spread for the BC Lions Society for Children with Disabilities.

At least one local American professed enthusiasm over the news.

“I think the eagles are exciting,” says a GVRD resident of Texan extraction. “They are so patriotically American.”

Others have taken issue with the implications of BC Lions Society president Stephen Miller’s statement that “No West Coast bird is more majestic than the bald eagle.”

“Majestic?” scoffed suburbanite F.G. Maktaaq. “What about the bold raven? The street smart crow? The urban pigeon in iridescent splendour? The French fry-thieving sea gull? The wily whiskey jack? What’s with the anti-scavenger mentality in this city?”

The eagles will complete the trilogy representing land, water and sky. Pending the success of the eagles, the BC Lions Society is looking for inspiration at other elements (i.e. wood represented by the mountain pine beetle) and even other dimensions (i.e. a will o’ the wisp to represent the supernatural in Super Natural British Columbia).

6 Comments so far

  1. Jeffery Simpson (unregistered) on March 1st, 2007 @ 8:20 pm

    What will Stephen Colbert think? He just got the people of Bellingham to coax Stephen Jr. back across the border. I can’t see him standing for this.

  2. ddrucker (unregistered) on March 2nd, 2007 @ 10:37 am

    This whole exercise is so old and tired that it just isn’t clever any more, no matter what people do with it. It has 1980s Chamber of Commerce me-too written all over it. Can’t the BC Lions Society be a bit more creative?

    It reminds me of that Saturday Night Live sketch about the guy who wrote the movie ‘Soylent Green’, who goes on a talk show to talk about his sequel, ‘Soylent Yellow’ (with Phil Hartman doing his best Charlton Heston imitation, shouting that ‘It’s STILL made of people! They haven’t changed the recipe!’)

    So, get ready for the inevitable eagle in a spacesuit, eagle in a tourist outfit, eagle chomping on a cigar like the comic ‘Shoe’, eagle-dude grasping a skateboard in his talons… (*sigh*)

    Let’s just skip it and say we did it already, shall we?

  3. Ryan Cousineau (unregistered) on March 2nd, 2007 @ 11:08 am

    DDrucker: while your aesthetics can hardly be called misplaced, are you stepping up to donate the cash these projects generate for charities?

    It could be a whole project: you collect money for each location, and when enough is raised, put a small plaque up explaining how sponsor X has paid so that no tacky sculpture will darken the sidewalk there.

    At the end, you auction off the plaques!

  4. Carla (unregistered) on March 2nd, 2007 @ 10:54 pm

    oh no
    not again!

  5. Ryan Cousineau (unregistered) on March 3rd, 2007 @ 9:23 pm

    Carla, are you quoting a bowl of petunias?

    Because if you are, that’s really funny.

  6. Matt (unregistered) on March 4th, 2007 @ 9:07 am

    I actually like Ryan’s “Donate now to PREVENT your street corner from being vandalized by an obnoxious piece of kitsch pop-art!” plan, if we’re forced into choosing, that is.

    That the Spirit Whatevers earn money for charities doesn’t justify them. Lots of schemes could earn money for charity, but that doesn’t make them a Good Idea.

    I’m sure collecting sponsorship money from random taggers to allow their spray paint to remain on conspicuous city landmarks could rake in some dough for charity, too, but are we doing that? No. Why? Because taggers are typically members of disadvantaged socioeconomic groups with bad taste, rather than the members of primarily white anglo-saxon protestant organizations with bad taste (who apparently think the Spirit Whatevers beautify rather than litter our city).

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