The Vancouver Five: iPhone 3G

Apple 3G iPhone in Hong Kong, originally uploaded by Lawrence Wii.

Five reasons to fear the coming of the iPhone 3G:

  1. Your iPhone is totally going to be lame now, loser.
  2. Watching There Will Be Blood and driving may actually prove to be more dangerous than cell phone talking and driving.
  3. Ted Rogers will soon have enough money to finish his doomsday device which he is calling, as per his usual naming methodology, Rogers Destrocto Beam.
  4. Canada gets the “Jesus Phone” that means America now gets Jesus. The end times are near.
  5. While trying to play the new Maroon 5 song you accidentally call your mother on her birthday. A three hour conversation filled with guilt and accusations results, teaching you never to try to listen to Maroon 5 again.
  6. Bonus: You actually listen to Maroon 5.

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